Am I Jaded or Is Something Missing?

Being a writer has changed the way I read books. That's a good thing. And a bad thing.

Good things:

• I can more easily recognize and explain what I like about books.
• Plot twists delight me more.
• I better appreciate a well turned phrase more.

Bad things:

• I can more easily recognize and explain what I don't like about books.
• It's easier to predict the plot.
• Lots of writing fails to draw me in and engage me with the characters.

It's that last bullet that I think about the most.

I've been reading on my own for 50 years. Libraries are a way of life for me. I adore bookstores, especially used bookstores where I can afford to buy something. I tend to gravitate toward the classics and literary contemporary books of various genres. Not so much bestsellers. Things like Jane Eyre. Authors like Steinbeck and Dickens. And L'Engle, Leguin, And of course there are many more that escape my memory.

These days I'm reading my indie-author peers quite a bit. There are slews of us in every genre. Unfortunately, I'm find a common flaw with many of the books I'm reading.

I don't care as much as I would like about the protagonist. It's not that I don't like them as...people. They're nice with goals I understand. They're just not deep enough, three-dimensional enough, not emotionally there enough. They tend to think the same things over and over.

Romances are easy to come by on Kindle for free. I kind of hate to admit, as a person who would love to live by my writing one day, that I get most of my books for free. But I try to leave a review, especially if there are not many posted. And I talk about what I liked.

So, I've been reading contemporary romance. Because that's sort of what I write.

And most aren't satisfying. I don't feel the loneliness of the protagonists before they meet the one, or the elation or the frustration when they do. The characters experience something, but not deeply enough to pass on to me. I'm kind of like, Meh, that's nice. Or Really?  Or, That's too bad. Life goes on.

Kind of like watching a movie while doing something else and realizing I'm getting enough of the story to know what's happening so I don't have to stop what I'm going to focus. And the movie doesn't do enough to make me want to stop what I'm doing, so I don't.

Like I said earlier, I've been around the library stacks quite a few times, and around the  proverbial block. Somethings just don't get to me like they used to; the old been there done that. But a good romance should, don't you think? Am I not still a woman? Is my heart not still beating? Last time I checked, yes to both.

For a little while I thought, well, it's just me, I'm jaded. But then I remembered some books I've read lately. South of Bixby Bridge by Ryan Winfield. Trevor pulled me into his life completely. Another is
Into the Free by Julie Cantrell. These books weren't like, "Well, I guess I can read a little now." They were like, "I've GOT to read. Now!"

New books, new authors who know how to engage readers.

I'm still going to support my fellow indie authors by reading and reviewing the books that appeal to me. And I'm still reading each one hoping it will hook me so I HAVE to read it.

With most of my life behind me, and as a writer, I don't have time to waste on what doesn't compel me to keep reading.



What about you? How do you engage with a book? What sucks you in and holds you? What disappoints you it it's not there?

I'm an Indie Author!

We do it for love before we do it for money.

I decided to call myself and indie author instead of self-published. Indie puts one in the same circles as indie filmmakers and musicians. Those folks are viewed as adventurous and risk-takers, and buckers of the system. They have the aura of mystique and are held in awe by anyone who ever wished they could break out of the mold.We all put our vision into the medium we love or can use the best, then spend a lot of our own time and our own money to get it out into the world.

Some of us go to school to learn to do what we love, others learn as we go. We learn the rules and break them when it makes sense to us. We talk to others who do the same thing. We form friendships and networks in real life and on the internet. We share experiences and tips and resources and encouragement.

Fans of indie artists want to be ones who "knew him when he published his first book online," or, "saw their show at a little pub years before they signed with that big record label." (I don't even know what big record labels there are anymore!) Or, "I saw her first film at the local film festival and stayed for the question and answer part."

Sometimes fans of indies want their discoveries to stay indie, to not sell out to the labels and studios and publishers. I imagine most indies want to get noticed by some big entity so we can do what we love full time and have someone else manage the business end while we do the creative part. And I suppose a lot of us hope someday we can have the money that goes with being on the top of the heap.

Most of us know that probably won't happen. That we'll labor in obscurity, doing what we love. But some people get noticed and get that lucky break or know how to put themselves in front to the right people at the right time and place. They work hard and have everything in place and are ready.

I've never been happy doing things the same way as most people. Maybe that's just because I never really figured out how! I'm proud to be indie and proud of my friends who are.

Now, back to work to get ready for that lucky break...